I wrote this yesterday. I realize the storm I got myself into is because I did not take the time to start my day with God. Today I did and I feel renewed and refreshed what a difference a day makes. Thank you Jesus for a new day and a new chance!
Let me know if you have ever had day like this
I’m going to break this open
I’m going to be very real and open.
Today I will battle. Today I will pray harder. Go deeper into God’s Word. Today I will allow the Lord to lead the way. To fight this battle. I know when I struggle I have to focus more. Here is the pity party I started in today but came out stronger than ever. The enemy will never win. He has already been defeated. He may get me down but he will not keep me down because God is always by my side waiting for me to reach out and battle for me. I just have to always remember to give this to Him,
Sitting here feeling sorry for myself. Feeling like if I never reached out to anyone I would just be alone. That no one would probably reach back. I feel like I have done that lately just to see who even cares. People reach out when they want something or need something but never to see how you are doing. Never to just check in with you about your life if you are doing ok. People just seem to wonder through life worrying about their tiny worlds. I feel like I’m in the middle of the storm and trying to get to the other side. I know the blessings are here in this day but the storm has clouded me. I remind myself that my parents and my son love and care about me. I remind myself God loves me. Why does some days you just don’t feel enough. Why do some days I wish for friends to love and support me. Why do I wish for someone to love and share my life with. To be enough. To feel enough. To have someone stick around and never leave me. To support me when I’m sad. It’s very exhausting to always be the one to have to be strong. To be the one to lift myself back up. I try to be strong for so many but who can be strong for me when I feel weak?
Then I think while it would be nice if someone reached out to me once in awhile that’s not what it’s all about. Even if they aren’t making true connection doesn’t mean I should stop. It’s about helping others and always continuing to grow spiritually. I could sit here in my own little pity party or I can stand and do something to bring glory to God. It’s not even about me and my sorry for myself feelings. It’s about uplifting others and sharing love. If they aren’t sharing doesn’t mean I got to pull back. I got to keep on sharing love and God’s Word.
Once again I must stand up dust myself off and find my strength in the Lord. He provides what I need in thus storm. I need to let go of my expectations of how I think people should act or be. I need to get out if my funk by immersing myself in fellowship, song and praise to God. Bible study and prayer.
The difference in today than yesterday was I started my day in prayer. I continued in fellowship and worship and your whole outlook changes. The storm might still be there but now you are equipped to handle it.
There is a huge difference in your day if you don’t start with God. That us a day that can include stress, struggles, doubt, fears and when you do start with God you replace all that with peace in knowing God has got this and He is with you always.
9 “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”